A note to an old love...

I'm human and flawed and make mistakes and don't know everything and get scared and all those things. But I also know I was not strong enough for both of us, I could barely handle things on my own, so for self perservation I had to do what I knew to do to survive. I have an expectation of a relationship, for right or wrong, my example has been my parents and my daddy does everything and I was not necessarily expecting that from you solely but at the point where I felt unprotected I jumped ship.  Again in hindsight not the best thing for us and our relationship but just being honest. But I did love you, like I've never loved a man before, and I wanted us to work, but it just was not the right time. I do believe that you are a good person with a great heart and will defend you to the end, but our coming together at that time was not aligned and I am thankful for not pushing it and letting go when I did; its not what I wanted at that time but it was what I needed. I had a hard, hard, hard year last year when we broke up; not a moment of rest, but I pushed forwarded and I perservered and I am at a place that i want and need to be, but I'm human and i still miss our bond.  Maybe I will be so lucky and find someone else who makes me feel like you made me feel and more, but until then I am on my grind. It's lonely yes, but it is where I'm suppose to be. So ultimately I say this to say, I've done what I'd hoped I would never do, I chose career over love; I chose me over us...